Happy Thanksgiving

How are you celebrating? What are you thankful for?
I'm thankful for the wonderful crazy bunch of people who make up OWOA. I couldn't do this without you guys!

Time to Weigh-in

Welcome to the new week. How are you? What did you do in the last week?
As well as weighing in, why not name something that went well last week and something you'd like to improve on.

My Dad

Hey guys. I just wanted to pop in and ask for prayers for my family. My Dad went to the hospital in heart failure. Once there they put him on a nitrate drip because his bp was extremely high and they found that he is in renal failure. He's been on the drip for almost 24 hrs and his bp is still high. I just got off the phone with him and it is 185/128. They are currently working on getting the dr. to get paperwork signed to get a blood transfusion going. While we were talking he told me he has a tired spirit. My Dad's health has been failing for a couple years now. He's only 51.

The kids and I will load up and trek on up to see him tomorrow. I'm sorry if I seem short and a bit distant in this post. There is so much involved behind the scenes in my family. My mom is up to her usual antics even with my Dad being in the hospital which make things seem rougher.
Thanks guys.

An example week

Monday
Weigh in, not particularly like the number I see on the scale. Looking after the kiddos, so meals sometimes take place at funny moments/are interrupted, get bored/feel sad, decide to comfort myself, after it's Monday, so there's a whole week before we have to weigh in again.

Tuesday
Similar to Monday, it's still the beginning of the week, often have the kids. Try a bit harder, but still seem doomed to fail. Wander aimlessly around the kitchen looking for something to eat.

Wednesday
Middle of the week, feeling ok. Generally do alright with eating. Maybe have one 'cheat'

Thursday
Church small group night, there's always lots of treats on offer. Try hard to resist, but somehow later find myself eating absent mindedly.

Friday
Teeny tots in the morning - have to try to resist the biscuits, sometimes go for lunch afterwards, Pizza Hut and the lunch buffet are the nearest and cheapest options. Load my plate with salad, but somehow lots of pizza makes it onto my plate. Spend the evening going out for a meal with friends/boyfriend, or down the pub drinking things like coke.

Saturday
Get up early for church prayer meeting. May grab something to eat on the way, go for breakfast with a group of people afterwards, go tutoring, go home, grab something else to eat - not lunch exactly as had a big breakfast at 10am. Snack my way through the rest of the day, eat dinner either out with friends or at home with family.

Sunday
Try really hard to resist the cakes after church, when they come past you for the 10th time give in and grab a piece of shortbread or chocolate brownie. Go out for lunch. Realise that I'd made rubbish decisions all week, and so give up on the diet and end up eating lots of crisps (chips), and bread and other delightful carbs, including pudding.

Monday
Wake up and go bleugh at the number on the scale.

Good morning

Walk this weigh to share your weight.

(I really need to work with coming up with something catchy to say on these weigh-in posts. Blest was so much better at them than me!)

It doesn't count because....

I think I'd figured out one of the reasons why the scale isn't moving for me.
I've been making excuses, telling myself that certain things don't count under certain circumstances, when actually, at the end of the day, if it's going in my mouth, it counts.
I think I need to get back to journaling my food for a few days and see what's really going into my mouth.

Here are a few I've caught myself using.

It doesn't count if I eat it when I'm out of the house.
It doesn't count if I've been carrying it around in my bag for a few days (fruit/nuts/chocolate)
It doesn't count when I eat it because I'm hungry just before bed.
It doesn't count if I just help the kids finish off their dinner.
It doesn't count if I'm eating it off someone else's plate.

The problem is, it always counts.
What excuses have you been using?!

Where's the mojo?

I've had thoughts rolling around in my head for a while. When wrote a post on Friday I know I sounded desperate and at that moment I was. I was in a state of wanting to just not care and have what I want. Is a burger bad...no. Is Chinese bad...no. Is it good for me...I would venture to say no. Will I die or get some horrible sickness from eating a burger. No (hopefully not). Brandi and Elly were sweet and completely correct in their response to my post but at that moment in time, I needed to stick to my guns (Friday), and deny myself a burger or Chinese or whatever else. You see, I've come to the realization after being "stuck" where I'm at on the scale for a 1 1/2 yrs that I can't seek or hope for some light bulb moment. Some moment of external motivation. I have to dig deep inside of myself and force myself to make the right decisions. It's a constant. I have to constantly deny myself. I have to tell myself that although that pumpkin pie that I'm craving won't really hurt me, it's not whats best for me...at that moment. Now mind you, I'm not saying to give up everything. Have I had some pumpkin pie? Not recently but I did 2 weeks ago. Last Saturday Jeff and I went to Burgerville and split a burger and large fry for lunch. We each ordered a shake and split it with the kids. Since then, I have denied myself any other self indulgences. Have I wanted other things, yes. Have I allowed myself, no. Guys, we have to just dig. We have to stay strong and do what we do with the purest of intent.

I don't know how many of you know but this summer I started studying for a Bachelor of Science in Holistic Nutrition. If that doesn't seem crazy, I don't know what does. Here I struggle with loosing more weight, struggle with making healthy food decisions and yet decide to study nutrition. Any hoots, I wanted to share something from one of the books I've had to read. I know it's something many of us have said over and over and over again (to ourselves) but I feel it's worth being said again. In Elson M. Haas' book Staying Healthy with Nutrition he states "When we say the word diet, many of us may think of a particular time when we tried to lose or gain weight before going back to what we usually eat. Who we are, how we feel, and how we look in size and shape are the results of what we eat, our eating habits, and all that we do and think. So, if we wish to change in any way, we probably need to change our diet-that is, what and how we eat-rather than go on a diet."

Later Haas states, "Balancing our diet requires developing new tastes." and "Changing our diet or lifestyle is not necessarily easy, but it can be done, and it may influence many other aspects of our life for the better"

So, where did your motivation mojo go? How do you get it back. To use the phrase Nike coined, "Just do it". Dig down, dig deep, pray, and do it. It's a struggle. Don't I know all to well. It's a struggle that's worth it.

Weigh to go

I've got so many blog posts going round my head, but none of them have quite made it to the actually sitting down to write a blog post. I've also had the busiest weekend that I've had in a long time - I'm ready for another weekend just to recover!
So I'm sorry I haven't been around much this past week or so, I'll try harder this week...!
While you're here, weigh in!

(and and you might want to pop over to Brandi's site to see some fantastic news, and don't forget Debbie's site too..!)

My leg grew

Honestly. Go read about it!

I'm Sick

of eating healthfully! There. I said it. I've have eaten so stinking well for an entire week and I'm sick of it. I swear I gag at the idea of eating anymore greens (lettuce, spinach, kale), tomatoes, black beans...anything. The part that erks me more than anything is the fact that the scale was up 1.4 pounds this morning from my lowest weight this week. Grrr......
I so seriously want some Chinese right now. Will I? No. But I'm sick of eating good for my health and good for my waist line food. How about a burger? A yummy, juicy, make me gain 3 pounds burger? No? Whaaaa.

*I just wanted to jump back on here and say that I know that I can't look at eating healthily for just the purposes of weight loss. I know that there is so much more to being healthy. I comforted in knowing that for a period of time I'm not being a glutton, I'm comforted in knowing that I'm striving to make serious change in my life, I'm comforted in knowing that I'm working on making a change for my children.

oh, and a picture :)

Here he is with the boys. We didn't even think to get one of all of us. Oh well :) Enjoy!

He's home! and other news

So that's my big news!! My big ol' Marine is home finally. We're still down in Eastern NC for de-briefing and such but we'll be back on the other side of the state soon. :)

Other news, my challenge goals are going well. I've been a bit low on water intake since I'm not at home but other then that the rest are well. I suspect I might have even started losing a bit of weight! Woot! No scale around so hopefully next Monday will be a good start.

Also in other news, I start my new job when I get back home. I haven't had one in years because I've been staying at home with the little ones so this is exciting for me. I need social interaction. Very much so. :)

That's all for me, just wanted to pop in and say hello and I haven't forgotten about you guys!! *hugs*

Challenge Check in

How's it going??? 2 weeks down, 8 to go. It's going really well for me right now. I am on the computer at a time that I had said I wouldn't BUT I haven't been on it yet and have been staying away from blogland SO, I'm still on track.
Time to get to 2 fussy little ones.

Sometimes I Can't Figure Out ...

... if I'm Gilligan or the portly Skipper. Anyway, here's an excerpt from my journal this morning:

Throughout my whole weight loss journey, since March of 2007, I've lost more than 50 pounds. I should be ecstatic, but in many ways I feel disappointed. I had expected to reach my goal (72 pounds) by August of 2007, and here I am in November 2008 and I'm not even close. I still have the 20ish extra pounds hanging around, and I still have a strong desire to eat and eat and eat.

I feel like I'm on an island by myself. Most people would look at me and say, “Hey, you've lost over 50 pounds, be happy! That's enough” I don't feel that way, though. The hard thing is spiritual leaders (who I admire) can't even relate to my problem. Either they don't have an eating issue, or they do and they don't seem to care. That's why I feel like I'm on an island by myself. 

Welcome to a new week

Good morning, it's Monday again.
The sun isn't shining here, but maybe it is where you are...
How are your numbers looking today?

Julie's goals

Julie has trouble posting, so she emailed me her 3 main goals for this
current challenge:

Drink 3 pts water a day.

Catch up and keep up to date with my Bible reading plan.

Lose weight for at least 5 of the 10 weeks, staying level on the other
weeks. (ie, NO gains)